TV Dinners: Giada De Laurentiis’ Baked Artichokes with Gorgonzola and Herbs

Interwebs, I have a secret. I have a girl-crush on Giada De Laurentiis.

She’s Italian, sexy, stylish, AND she makes cooking look crazy easy. And even though she shows off her perfect Italian pronunciation like an overzealous anchorwoman, she manages to be adorable while doing so. I think The Hubs is hiding his annoyance with how much space Everyday Italian and Giada at Home are taking up on the TiVo. I can’t help it. I heart her.

So when my mom said she was making me Giada’s Baked Artichokes with Gorgonzola and Herbs, I all but squealed with glee. I loooooove artichokes. I love Giada. I love gorgonzola. Yup. Mom rocks.

Mom and I are artichoke snobs and we take them ever so seriously. Right off the bat, we were confused when Giada directed us BOIL them. Boil? Seriously? Not steam? We were baffled and I started to question my crush. But we pressed on.

Moving on to the cheese filling. Mmmmmm. Cheese. Ten ounces seemed like a LOT for such a strong cheese as Gorgonzola but loving the dairy delight, we shrugged it off and blended it all with parsley, garlic, salt and pepper. Shaking our heads, we pulled the ‘chokes out of the boiling water and filled them with the cheese mix, topped with a combo of bread crumbs and parsley, drizzled with olive oil and baked them for the 25 minutes per the recipe.

Timer dinged! Tummies growled! Oven opened ~ frowny faces. No crisp golden crumb topping as Giada had told us. Instead, a puddle of oily cheese gloop in some sad lookin’ artichokes.

We set the timer for ten more minutes.

Nada. Another ten.

Nope. Another five.

Oily pool with some brown crumbs floating on top. We finally took them out and gave them a whirl.
WTH, Giada?!?!? Why do you hate me?

Sadly, ours looked nothing like The Food Network's pic.

They were awful. I guess the one saving grace was the Gorgonzola’s crazy overpowering of the artichokes shoe-leather like texture. We tried to power through, we really did. But after only a few bites, Mom and I were defeated by the rubbery leaves and greasy cheese. We never even got to our beloved hearts.

Giada, I loved you. I wanted us to be besties. I envisioned quaint backyard BBQs, sunset cocktails and girlish giggles over kitchen mishap story swapping. But noooooooo. You not only threw our love away, you made my mother violate defenseless artichokes and innocent Gorgonzola!

Sigh. Giaga, I beg of you. Never make people treat such perfect ingredients so cruelly again. I hope I can forgive you, but the artichokes and I will never forget.

See? She's mean to tomatoes, too!

Lady B’s Final Say So:

• Ease Factor: 4 out of 5 noms
• Taste Test: 0 out of 5 noms
• Truth in Advertising: 1 out of 5 noms
• The Hubs’  (well in this case, Mom’s) Vote: 1 out of 5 noms
• Yeah, but is it pretty?: 0 out of 5 noms
• Overall: Shame on you, Giada!

*Okay, I know my mom technically made this one. But as a witness to preparation and active participant in consumption, I’m using it, dammit.*


{originally posted on 1/3/12 here}