TV Dinners: Kelsey Nixon's Chicken Cacciatore

Internet, I have a confession to make. I didn't want to like the squeaky-clean, annoyingly chipper blonde host of The Cooking Channel's "Kelsey's Essentials." She's too perky for my taste. And too sparkly. And too perfectly young. And all know-it-all about telling me the essentials of my kitchen.

But internet, I can admit when I'm wrong. Dead wrong. 

I set out to make Kelsey's Chicken Cattiatore, scoffing when I saw the episode in my DVR. What could blondey know about true Italian food?

I love me some cattiatore. It's good ol' simple Italian rustic goodness. I've literally consumed gallons of said goodness in my life, but I've never attempted to make it myself. Internet, I also confess that I lack patience. Anything worth simmering in a Dutch oven requires a lot of waiting, and a lot of patience. Somehow Kelsey's "essential" version claimed to take only 95 minutes. Silly, Kelsey. You can't rush such goodness! Braising takes time. Dutch oven goodness takes time. *This is where my husband would make a Dutch oven joke. I'm pretty sure the only reason he bought me one was so that he could make these jokes whenever I use it.* Getting simple rustic flavors to truly reach their full flavor potential means giving them the respect, and time, they deserve. I take this shit seriously. *That's where The Hubs would say "I take Dutch ovens seriously" and probably fart.* I started preparing myself for another lackluster TV Dinner, already grumbling about the lack of any real flavor from these TV recipes and apologizing to you in the blog I was writing in my head...

I gathered up the ingredients. Simple ones. With wine. Yes. I opened the wine immediately. So it could, you know, breathe. In my mouth.

I salted and peppered chicken thighs before dredging them in flour and browning. The online recipe doesn't tell you to, but you should always pat your chicken dry before doing this. Use paper towels and blot, blot, blot. Dry chicken = crispy golden crust. Trust this. The recipe also calls for a whole chicken. I was lazy and the thighs were on sale. Trust in improvisation, too.

I browned a few pieces at a time to avoid overcrowding. While you wait for your little chickens to get all goldy browny, you may start to look at the clock and think to yourself, "Huh. Hour and a half? Riiiiiiggght." Just me? Fair enough. But I was highly doubting this dinner would really only take 95 minutes to make. So I passed the time by letting some more wine breathe. In my mouth.

See? Perfectly golden brown. Power of the paper towel pat down.

I took the thighs out of the pot to rest and started adding all kinds of happiness in my beloved Le Creuset. Even though it does require so much of that patience I've confessed to not having, I really do love any excuse to use it. It's a good calming exercise for my mental state. And my mouth.

Internet, I have another confession to make. I wasn't exactly sure what cremini mushrooms were. At the market, I guessed and got the little white ones. When I got home I asked the mighty Google and discovered I was wrong. Oh well. I will also confess that I forgot to add them until the last second. Improvisation, folks.

 

I added the happy golden chickens back into the pot to simmer and set my timer for 40 minutes. When it went off, I glanced at the the clock. And then my picked my jaw up from the floor. GUYS. It ACTUALLY TOOK 95 MINUTES. Exactly. Whoa.

Also, it looked like this:

And tasted like this:

Source: crunchybetty.com via Andrea on Pinterest

You know, if that kind of heaven were a flavor. Damn. That would taste good. Like this cattiatore.

Kelsey Nixon just made me compare chicken to Ryan Gosling. It's that good, people.

As The Hubs stuffed his mouth, I told him "It's a TV Dinner ya know."

Hubs: Oh yeah? It fucking rules. *shoved more bread and sauce in his face*

Me: Yeah. You have Kelsey Nixon to thank for this.

Hubs: Well, I'd like throw her on this table and make a woman out of her to thank her for this.

Yup. It's that good.


Lady B’s Final Say So:

• Ease Factor: 5 out of 5 noms (And clean-up was wicked easy, too!)
• Taste Test: 5 out of 5 noms
• Truth in Advertising: 5 out of 5 noms
• The Hubs’  Vote: "Possibly 5. But I'm also a little drunk."
• Yeah, but is it pretty?: 4 out of 5 noms. Served with crusty bread, it's nothing fancy looking. But it's so pretty in your mouth.
• Overall: Kelsey, will you marry us?